Is it okay not to give all your profit back to your clients?

Is it okay not to give all your profit back to your clients?
You finally made the leap and are getting paid a price that
feels good. Except that it's itching the back of your neck,
the back of your heart. You're uncomfortable.

Next thing you know, you're working twice as hard, putting
in extra hours, doing all kinds of little extras for your
clients. You're exhausted. You're depleted. And you only
raised your prices 20%-- why is it that you feel like
you're working -harder- than you were before you raised
your prices?

The question in the back of your heart: "Is it really okay
to profit from your clients?"

The healthy unbalance that profit brings. Profit,
technically, is 'extra.' After you've given everything you
have to give, and taking care of everything your business
needs, anything 'left over' is the profit.

But, that seems unnatural, doesn't it? If you give 100% of
your love, caring, and effort to your client, shouldn't
your client be giving only 100%, not 120%? How can you
justify having extra?

Well, balance isn't always healthy. Sometimes imbalance is
better.

Over-giving begets over-giving. In nature, very little
stays in stillness. Things are constantly in motion. In
fact, stillness, if held for too long, is stagnation...
which then starts to decompose, moving out of stillness.

Bert Hellinger, the noted German psychologist who brought
systemic constellation work to light, says some very
consistent patterns about giving. The observation is that
when you give, it creates an imbalance. The person given to
naturally wants to give back.

This is true whether you give beneficially, or harmfully.
If you give beneficially, the person given to wants to give
back, plus just a little bit extra. And if you give
harmfully, the person given to wants to hurt you back, plus
just a little bit extra.

When you are willing to receive profit, you contribute to
an ever-expanding cycle of either generosity or harm.
Clearly, one is preferred over the other.

Staying in generosity and avoiding harm. The key, as you
might have guessed, is in your heart. Ever notice that when
you work too hard trying to do too much for your client,
they don't appreciate it? They get crabbier, more
demanding, more upset?

>From the circumstances, it seems like they are being
ungrateful. But at heart, what's really going on is they
are responding unconsciously to a harmful action. The
so-called "giving back" is subtly a rejection of their
generosity. The resulting overwork can be an attempt to
actually erase and wipe-out that generosity, which is a
harmful action.

Here's the question: When you receive that profit, are you
truly receiving it, in a spirit of authentic appreciation?
That appreciation engenders a feeling of fullness and
nourishment in your heart and being. Then that fullness
naturally cascades over and you can give from a place of
true love back to your client.

An Example Gone Wrong. A client of ours was just taking on
some new clients, at a higher rate than she had charged
previously. She was nervous about it, and a little
off-center.

Unconsciously, she sprang into doing mode. She went not
just the extra mile, but the extra ten miles, spending
literally hours of extra time picking up pieces and doing
work for clients, that her clients should've been doing for
themselves.

The result? Her clients weren't grateful at all. They were
annoyed, upset, demanding, and crabby. Significantly, the
main complaint that surfaced was along the theme of "I'm
not making the progress I wanted to."

The truth was, she hadn't truly received their generosity.
By doing extra she was saving the client from the struggle
that begets growth.

A 30 second exercise. Take a moment now, and think of a
client who paid you recently, especially if it was a higher
payment than you're normally used to receiving. Take a
moment in appreciation to really let that in. Let go of
your attempts to push it away, or to "earn it" by working
harder.

Just receive.

Much better, eh? But, I'm guessing you do have a feeling of
generosity, a desire to give back. How do you make sure
that you are being truly generous, and not harmfully wiping
out their generosity?

Let's take a look.

Keys to Expanding the Generosity Cycle. ? When you receive
payment, stop for a moment.

When someone pays you, stop to be grateful for it. Instead
of worrying whether they paid too much, or whether you can
actually perform, or all the other worries that will tend
to crop up - just stop. Breathe.

And then open your heart to feel the truth that your client
wanted to give that money to you, and they did. They chose,
of their own free will, to pay you. Open your heart to that
truth, and let it in.

? Before you go the extra mile, check with your heart.

Are you thinking of doing something 'extra' for your
client? Take a moment to check-in with your heart. If the
action feels like it's coming from generosity, and there's
no 'should' or 'trying to earn' that's attached, then
you're fine.

However, if you do feel a heaviness, stickiness, or any
kind of vague pressure or anxiety associated with it, then
don't do it. Instead of trying to get rid of that vague
discomfort through overgiving to your client, instead make
more space in your heart for receiving, and breathing.

? Invest your profit in three different ways. The extra
that comes in? You receive it gratefully, by investing it
in three different ways:

1) Invest in your business, so that it can continue to
develop and grow. Learning, classes, hiring help, buying
equipment. Things that help the infrastructure and health
of your business are great investments.

2) Invest in the world. Tithing a percentage of your profit
to those in need is a healthy part of any financial life.
It functions under the playground rule: share with others.
If you get a bigger piece of cake, you share it. Not all of
it, you keep some. But you give some, too.

3) Invest in yourself and your family. Enjoy the extra!
Live a little! Go out to dinner, or put it into a
retirement fund, or fix up your house, or save it for a
rainy day, or a little of all of those. If you aren't
enjoying the fruits of your labors, then your business is
going to become less and less fun.

The whole idea of "extra" that profit brings up is a
strange idea, since there's no extra in nature. But, if you
truly receive the so-called 'extra' in gratitude, and let
yourself be a part of the cycle of giving, you'll find a
great deal of ease and generosity in your clients, and in
your life.

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Mark Silver is the author of Unveiling the Heart of Your
Business: How Money, Marketing and Sales can Deepen Your
Heart, Heal the World, and Still Add to Your Bottom Line.
He has helped hundreds of small business owners around the
globe succeed in business without lousing their hearts. Get
three free chapters of the book online:
http://www.heartofbusiness.com