Copyright 2005 Mark MeshulamWe all go nuts sometimes. Even someone as sublimely well
balanced as myself goes off the deep end once in a while.
When this happens, the bizarre behavior of the suddenly
wacko can bring damage to themselves, their business
relationships, and yes, even their furniture.
Why do we go bananas? Sometimes we allow frustrations to
accumulate without releases such as "talking it through",
physical activity or masturbation until we boil over.
Sometimes a situation pushes a button in our psyche which
releases a gusher of emotion stored from long-ago pain.
This eruption can come seemingly from nowhere and usually
scares the piss out of everyone in range including the
eruptor himself.
At Evanston(IL) Hospital Outpatient Psychiatry, where I
spent a six month internship bringing better mental health
to scores of afflicted suburbanites, it was openly
discussed that more people would flip out during the full
moon. I believe the term they used was "we have more
patients in crisis". Is this human response to the 28 day
lunar cycle the etymology of "looney"?
Perhaps not so coincidently, another 28 day cycle which can
bring occasional bouts of wackiness is the so-called female
cycle, which is not to be confused with a Vespa motor
scooter. This caused some UFO theorists to opine that women
might actually be aliens not from Venus as originally
believed, but rather from the Moon, come to disrupt the
football games and bank accounts of men.
Some say that men have a similar cycle - not to be confused
with a Harley Davidson - but men are either too complex, or
more likely far too simple and random for a true pattern to
emerge.
Whatever the reason, when someone you know goes apeshit, do
the following:
1. Get the hell away. People in the throes of a psychotic
episode can have superhuman strength. They experience
something similar to the legendary adrenalin rush which
allows animal activists to lift cars off pinned-down pussy
cats, a frequent sight in my neighborhood. Nutcases in full
bloom can easily turn your head all the way around -
remember Linda Blair in The Exorcist? - by grasping it
lightly between thumb and forefinger.
2. Stay the hell away. When a person goes beserk, it can
last a few days. During that time he will be manically
obsessing about whatever insult or injury they perceived to
have happened. He is not negotiable yet; don't even try
unless your idea of fun is bashing your head repeatedly
into masonry.
3. Watch (from under the desk if necessary) for the real
person to return. After such an intense outpouring, Dr.
Jekyll will crash from exhaustion. When he emerges, he
might be in the sheepish, "What happened?" mode. That is
the time for love and support. Try saying, "Wow, you really
went through something there, didn't you?" If he says
something normal, like "yes", you are making progress. If
he snarls or throws his mouse at you, revert to #2 above.
4. Have some sympathy. Remember, you have gone daffy
yourself. Remember what it was like. It came from pain,
didn't it? That's what happened to your psycho, he had a
tsunami of pain. Remembering this will help you be
sympathetic. You might need this help if el loco stabbed
you in the eye yesterday with a letter opener.
5. Let him talk and offer only gentle guidance. If a person
talks enough, he will eventually realize that they got "out
of line", but he will need some space in order to realize
this. If you offer this insight yourself, especially too
early, you might get your hand stapled to your ear.
6. Listening is key. Here's how you do it: Look into the
person's eyes with a slightly sad frown. Nod slowly and
knowingly after they say each sentence. Resist the urge to
offer your wonderful opinion - this part is called
"shutting up". Wait until he stops talking. Count to 10.
Then say one carefully chosen sentence which is either
insightful or encouraging. Repeat until cool.
7. To take lunatic handling to the state of the art, try to
get him to analyze the triggering event and why it was so
extroardinarily evocative.
8. To really bring it on home, get your nutcase to commit
to monitoring his reactions, so that if another triggering
event occurs in the future, he will be ready with a better,
more adaptive behavior. This might include removing himself
from the situation with a planned excuse like, "Pardon me
but I must leave this meeting unexpectedly because my dry
cleaning is ready."
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Mark Meshulam designs productivity software, owns a
construction company and holds a masters in Group Dynamics.
His articles draw upon 27 years in business. Topics revolve
around people and technology
at work.
Blog: http://www.poingology.com
Try his software for free at http://www.poingo.com
